When You Think Things Are Bad......

.....trust me, it can always get worse!  For my next hair appointment (in like 2 more months) someone PLEASE stop me from wanting to cut it.   I need it to grow, and I need it to grow like now.  I hated it last time and I triple dog hate it this time.   I'm going to go cry now.  KBye

Yay for Off Track Time!!

It's time again to go off track. Hooray!  December is my favorite time to have off of school.  I get 4 weeks, which is longer than my usual 3.  I have time to get my Christmas shopping done, run errands and overall just enjoy the holiday season.  I haven't been a huge fan of Christmas for the past couple years, but I'm working on not being such a scrooge and enjoying just the simple things.  I put up my decorations the weekend of Thanksgiving which is always quite the ordeal.  I have a million boxes of Christmas decorations it seems. I think I might have enough to decorate a much larger house than mine, but I have to admit all the cute stuff around my home does make me happy.

My dad came last night to help me put the star on my tree since it wasn't cooperating.  Thanks Dad! :)  He also was able to help me string some lights on my balcony and set up my light up snowman.  Hooray!  I'm feeling very festive this year.

Snow

I've never been a huge fan of winter or snow in particular.  I don't like being cold, and I don't like driving in snowy conditions. Ick!  One of the things I do like about winter would be snowmobiling.  However, that topic would be for a different post. :)  All day Sunday into Monday morning we had quite the storm.  Monday morning my snow shoveler people never came.  Oh fabulous!  All I have to say about that is I get quite frustrated when I'm paying my HOA dues and the snow shoveler people don't show or do a crappy job.  I suck at shoveling my own driveway and it'll take me forever with my trusty little shovel.  I got stuck in the stupid street and was late to school.  Definitely not a great Monday!

When I got home that afternoon still no shoveling people.  Everyone had shoveled their own driveways and the sidewalks were a mess!  They showed up around 5:00 and did a pretty crappy job.  Maybe only about half of the sidewalks or half of some driveways were finished.  And I somehow ended up with more snow at the end of my driveway then was there before I shoveled.  Maybe you shouldn't be blocking my driveway with snow.  Just a thought.  They came back again on Tuesday to try and plow the rest of our streets.  Maybe if they'd done it all on Monday things wouldn't have turned so icy and it wouldn't have been such a pain to shovel.

Stupid Internet!

The Wednesday before Thanksgiving my modem died. I called the internet company that evening and of course they want me to try all these things that I've already tried before I even called them. Yup, it died, which I already knew. I ordered a new modem which they said would be expedited to me and I would receive it by Friday afternoon. Friday comes, no modem. I call again and they said there was never a note about expediting, so it was never shipped. They would ship it out Monday morning and I would receive it by Tuesday. Tuesday comes, I get a Fedex package with an installation CD, no modem. I call once again. There is no record of a modem being ordered. I talked to many people and asked where my modem was.....and they couldn't have mentioned that there was no modem? I was pretty upset by this point since my modem that was suppose to be ordered last Wednesday now would not get to me until Friday.

They transferred me to Loyalty where I talked to a complete jerk that was in Logan, Utah. I explained my long, annoying story and told him that I was completely frustrated with their service and needed some sort of compensation for my inconvenience. He told me he would refund me $7 on my bill for the unused internet time, and that was all. Really?! A bunch of idiots work for your company and can't even order a modem, or bother to tell me that there was no modem ordered and you won't give me anything else besides 7 pathetic dollars? I became very irate since someone who was suppose to be in customer service and helping me was a complete a$$! I told him he was no help and a very rude and disrespectful person! I would be contacting Comcast to receive better service and with someone that actually cares about their customers.

I was transferred to another department where I cancelled my stupid modem, cause why the heck would I want one of those now? Calling again on Wednesday (yup, I pretty much called every single day) they wanted to transfer me to Loyalty after I told them their customer service is horrible...heck no! Rude people work there! I actually got a nice guy this time who refunded me $100 on my bill for my inconvenience and checked to make sure that the modem was actually cancelled. Who can trust them after everything that has happened?

Friday morning, my cancelled modem arrived. Really? Maybe I should've cancelled it to begin with and it actually would have come. I don't want your stupid modem and you better not charge me for the dumb thing! Ugh! What a pain in my behind this whole thing has been!

Hair Drama

Have you ever had a haircut where you never really get attached to it, but it's "alright", and you figure maybe it'll grow on you (literally)? Then you go to get your hair done again and it's shorter and worse than you thought it was to begin with? Not a fan of my hair, hating it worse now since I just got it cut on Monday. I don't like it stacked in back, I don't like the layers all over, I hate it. If I had my way I'd wear a hat for the next couple months until everything grows out. Unfortunately I have to deal with it and hopefully not cry every day trying to make it work. The picture posted here is the new 'do that I want. I like the bob, it's easy to manage AND it's all one length. The back is not going to be stacked, I hate my "stackedness". I love the Aline, where it's longer in front and goes shorter in back, but keeping it all one length.....none of this layers, stacked, stupid short hairs that don't cooperate anywhere.

So, in a few months, or more, I'm hoping my hair will be looking more like this picture. I'll get back to you on that.....and in the meantime wish me luck and send me good hair day vibes!

Off Track Time

I didn't post at all why I was off track so now it seems I have a lot to catch up on. I went on the trip with my parents. The places we visited were great! I loved seeing Carlsbad Cavern. It was huge inside, much bigger than Timpanogos, which is all I had to compare it to. Definitely a fun experience, though I must say the city of Carlsbad was not my favorite, more of a dumpy little town really. I considered sleeping in the car. :) We went through El Paso, which was fun to see, though strange that I could see Mexico just across the freeway. We stayed a few nights in Phoenix, a much needed break from all of our driving. Round trip it was a total of 38 hours. Next time I vote for taking a plane.

A part of me is glad to be back on track. I must say I did miss a lot of these kiddos, I've got some cuties this year. The other part of me is wishing I could still be sleeping in and doing anything I want all day. It's nice to be back into a schedule, even though I'm not much of a morning person.

Happy Dance Time

I'm going off track today. Hooray! Don't get me wrong, I love Most of my kids. However, there are a few I could definitely do without seeing for 3 weeks, or more. I'm super excited for this weekend. My favorite (and only) nephew, Garrett, is getting baptized tomorrow. I can't believe he is already 8 years old and in 3rd grade. I love him!

My parents have invited me to go on vacation with them for a week to Carlsbad, New Mexico. Perfect timing while I'm off track, right? Has anyone been to the cavern there before? Any other suggestions on what to do while we're in the area? I'm excited to get some "me time" with my parents and also have a chance to get away from life for a bit. I have always loved traveling (though not necessarily long, boring road trips) and wish I could do more if my budget would allow. :)

Eminem - Love The Way You Lie

This song really spoke to me. I seem to have a lot of those lately. It's made me cry a few times, reminding me of my past. Other times it makes me feel good. Maybe because I've survived things I can't even imagine going through again, let alone the pain it causes me to remember. I blare this song on my radio anytime I hear it in my car. It's my favorite of the moment.

Thankful....I think

When unpleasant or terrible things happen to you it sure is hard to see the positive of it all. It's hard to see the pain ever ending, or life taking a turn for the better. Sometimes things happen for a reason but it sure seems unfair at the time for life dealing you such a crappy hand. I always hated when people would say, "I'm so blessed to have these trials". Maybe after it is all over and done with you can look back and say, "Wow, I survived. Look at how much stronger I am. Look at how much I have learned and grown." But when you're going through a trial are you really thankful and happy about it? I know I for one have a pity party every so often and think "Why me?!" Having a good cry sure does make you feel better!

I know looking back on the past few years of my life I think of all the mistakes I have made, all the stupid decisions or wrong choices I chose. I also remember the good things I have done, and the right decisions I made. Life is never easy and it's up to us the direction our life will take. Sure I have regrets. I still have crappy, miserable days where I'd rather lie in bed all day and not have to deal with other people, where talking to anyone about anything makes me want to cry. But I also have those days when I'm the happiest I've ever been, where I'm so grateful and optimistic about where my life is taking me and I'm looking forward to all the new and exciting things life has in store for me.

I've been through Hell and back (possibly a few times) and I know the happiness you can miss out on, the total despair and physical ache you can experience. I'm not happy having the memories of a sad life, remembering the pain and sorrow I felt and still do at times, but I can at least look forward to making and choosing a better life for myself. I know I will still make mistakes and fall down quite a bit, but I know I can get back up, dust myself off, and I'll be that much stronger and more determined.

Autumn

One of my favorite seasons is just around the corner. I love fall because of the cooler temperatures and the pretty fall leaves in the mountains. It also means my birthday is coming up. :) It seems a lot of the time we don't get much of a fall or spring, my two favorite seasons, and skip right into the next season. Here's to hoping this year we get a beautiful fall with fabulous weather!

The Muppets: Pöpcørn

Hehe! This is so dang funny! I'm getting quite a kick out of The Muppets on YouTube. I promise this'll be my last one.....maybe. Enjoy! :)

The Muppets: Stand By Me

I thought this was the funniest thing ever! I laugh hysterically every time I watch it. Maybe being around kids all day has me laughing at random things, but I sure enjoyed this one.

New Class

I'm loving these new kiddos! Yes, they're slow workers, and don't seem to catch on as quickly. Yes, some of them are super low and struggle without extra help. At first I was worried about them, but I've already been growing attachments to these darlings. I'm hoping it'll be a great year, and I'll love them even more as we go along. Here's to a fresh new year!!

Jar of Hearts

How sad is this song? It might've made me cry the first time I heard it. It definitely touched me with good and bad memories. Thanks Hayley for posting it so I could also share. I'm now looking forward to her album.

What a Week!

Last week they began breaking out the concrete on my driveway on Monday. They finished the driveway and broke out part of the sidewalk. Tuesday evening they carried away the broken up concrete and did nothing else. The concrete guy talked to me and said they would finish breaking up the rest of the sidewalk Wednesday and would be pouring on Thursday. Wednesday came and went and nothing was done. Wednesday night I received a message on my phone from the HOA lady. She proceeded to tell me that I should've received a notice on my door about the concrete replacement going on this week. The concrete company has tried to reach me and they are unable to gain access to my driveway. If I do not return her call tonight or first thing in the morning they will stop work on my driveway and do someone else and I will be held responsible to complete my own concrete. I was livid! I called her that evening and she must've already left her office. I woke up bright and early Thursday morning (as I have been every other morning in order to open the garage door for their "access").

I talked to beast lady and tried to stay calm as I told her that the concrete company tore out my driveway on Monday and have done nothing since. I have been without a car since Sunday night and they have had complete "access" to my driveway. I talked to said concrete man Tuesday night myself. She immediately started apologizing, "I'm so sorry. Well the concrete man called me saying they couldn't get to your driveway." Well maybe they got the wrong house lady! I don't appreciate being told off on my answering machine when I've done nothing wrong. Nothing is being completed at my house and I'm not happy about it! "I'll call them right now and tell to come over and finish." Yeah, right, once again nothing happened all day. Bite me stupid lady!

Friday they finished breaking out the rest of my sidewalk. Saturday they came and poured my driveway and some of the sidewalk. They ran out of concrete and would have to finish the rest on Monday. They still have not returned as of yet. Shocking! All I can say, is if they decide to replace the rest of my driveway next year that was not done this year, I'm going to have quite the tantrum. I'm not going through this again!

New Concrete

This week my townhome and many others around me are getting our concrete redone. Great idea, right? Every year some of the concrete, paint, etc. gets fixed. Last year part of my driveway was redone, so I couldn't park in my driveway for a few days. This year the part under my garage door in being done along with a bunch of the sidewalk up to my front door. Yes, I feel like I'm stuck in my house.

So once again, I can't park in my garage. Ugh! I was hoping and praying that my house would be done today and not tomorrow. I had to open my garage door halfway early this morning in order for them to have access (in hopes they were coming). Hooray! They are right now working on mine! That means tonight and tomorrow I can at least park in my driveway. The concrete will begin on Wednesday until Friday. Let's hope mine is done on Wednesday. It'll sure be great when it's all complete. But it's a definite pain in my behind in the meantime. :)

Ceiling Fan

The last little while I've been thinking about getting a fan in my family room. Friday after school I went with my parents to Lowe's and then Home Depot looking for what I wanted. Saturday evening the electrician came to install it and it was done in about 2 hours. I had to vacuum and dust some from when he cut the hole in the ceiling, and some of the mess from the attic trailed all over my house. But of course it was not nearly such a disaster as when I had my bathroom redone.

I love my new fan! This is a picture of the fan I chose, but you can also find it here. In the store it was on sale, so I think I got it for a pretty good price. I love that it keeps me much cooler in there. And I love that it has a light attached. I've only ever had a small lamp on my table (thanks Laura for letting me borrow yours while you don't need it) and it's kind of dark if I ever wanted to read or such. Now it's super bright, and I can stay super cool while I enjoy my book.

If I Were a Boy

Mmmm.... Massage

Today at school we had a company here doing free 5 minute massages during our lunch time. Am I totally weird that I've never had a massage before? It was the most fantastic 5 minutes ever! I'm thinking I've become quite the fan.

The girl that gave me my massage told me afterwards, that my spine is a little off center and wanted to know if I ever have back pain. Ummm, yeah, but doesn't everyone? I really never thought anything of it and blamed it on getting old and decrepit. Ha! The lady in charge said there is a 1 hour consultation if I'm interested and also gave me a coupon for a $39 massage. So fellow bloggers, or random people that read my blog, what do you think? Have you ever had a massage?

Just Keep Swimming, Just Keep Swimming....

It's that time of year when I break out my swimsuit and start regretting that I've only got bikini's to wear. Yeah, I'm not quite as in shape as I once was. I'm not going to disgust everyone by wearing my itty bitty bikini to layout or swim in the pool. I love my bikini tops that I've had for a few years, and am now wondering if I could get away with pairing them with different bottoms that might offer a bit more coverage. What do you think about this bad boy? The skirt design is sorta fun I thought. It's a basic black, so it should go with my pink heart and black bikini tops don't ya think?

Stick a Fork in Me, I'm Done!

I need this year to be over. School year, calendar year, whatever. Am I going to miss (most) of my kids? Might I get a little teary on the last day of school as my students leave for good? Yes, and yes. I've fallen in love with these little kiddos (mostly), and it's always hard to see them go. However, on the flip side, I'm ready for my summer to begin. I'm ready to start taking care of a few little projects at my house that have begun forming in my brain. Painting? Craft room closet organizing? I'm kind of excited to start. Yes, I can be kind of an organizing/neat freak at times. I like things the way I like them and boy does it feel good when everything has it's own little place.

My kids are so ready to be done, I'm so ready to be done. This on track time is the hardest to come back for. 3 weeks? Really? To do what? End of year testing is over, major curriculum is over, traditional school and A track students are all done.

Sometimes I'm ready to be done with this year in general. Another year over, another year hopefully dealing with less pain. Another year past my divorce. Looking ahead to better and happier years. Now if I could just live in my own little bubble world and not have others around to remind me of such painful memories and things that might never be, life would be that much easier to deal with. But then again, what would life be without the bad to make the good feel that much better.

Vacation?

Last Tuesday I thought I would head to St. George to meet up with my parents and stay for a few days for a little vacation while I was off track. When I got to St. George that evening my mom called me to let me know her and Dad were at the hospital and Dad was in the ER.

For the previous 2 week my dad had been having headaches. That day he stumbled a few times while walking and then his right arm went numb. They went to Instacare and were sent immediately to the ER. They began doing many tests; MRI's, CT Scans, MRV's, etc. They found numerous blood clots in his brain, behind his eyes, etc. Miraculously his veins had been compensating by rerouting around the blood clots, and expanding to let more blood through. He was in the middle of stroking when he arrived at the hospital. They were able to stop it before it climaxed. He was put on blood thinner to stop any more clots continuing. The doctors were very surprised he had not had a massive stroke, and said if he had come in 6 hours later he would've been a lot worse off. He still has headaches (due to the blood clots), and is walking much better. To begin with he was favoring his right side and was a little unbalanced. But other than that, he is doing quite well!

He has been discharged from the hospital, but has to remain in St. George for a couple more weeks until the Dr. gives him the okay to head home to Salt Lake. He is not allowed to bend over, making his head below his heart, in fear of dislodging a clot. He can not drive a car for so many months, or lift anything heavier than 10 pounds. Needless to say my few day "vacation" has turned into one a lot longer. My mom was so glad I came down when I did and was able to help out with things, and so she is not all by herself. We are all so thankful he is doing so well! A lot like my sister's stroke almost 2 1/2 years ago, what a miracle!

LOST.....I will miss you!

Disclaimer: Don't read this if you haven't watched the finale yet. I love, love, love LOST. I did not watch the original season from the beginning. I became addicted through renting the first few seasons before getting all caught up. I have to admit, it's much better watching them chunks at a time rather than waiting, anxiously, week to week, hoping they'll start answering the many questions being posed.

I have never been this addicted to a tv series! I became very attached to the characters and their lives. I might've cried many times, starting with Charlie....and Sun and Jin, you made me cry too. I wasn't quite sure what to expect for the series finale. I was excited to watch it, yet sad to see it all end. Definitely bitter sweet! Thank you Natalee for watching it with me! It's much more fun to share it with someone. I was surprised at many parts (What, Jack and Juliet were married, divorced, and had a child?). I might've exclaimed out loud, "I knew it!" when Hurley became in charge of the island. I cheered for Jack to push John off the cliff.....I yelled for Jack to run so he wouldn't die in the cave. I also might have cried when Sawyer and Juliet found each other at the candy machine. I'm still not sure if I quite understand the ending. Did they all die? How did they die? Was the "alternate universe" not real? What was real? Don't you worry, I have preordered the last season on dvd through Amazon, coming out August 24th. I think beginning all over again on Season 1 could possibly be in store. :)

Pajama Party

This past weekend my niece, Ashlie, had a sleepover with me. We started out with grilled cheese sandwiches and watched Princess and the Frog in our pj's while cuddling on the couch. She was then determined that we put on some music and dance around the house. Of course we did it. We read stories before bed and for the next hour or 2 Ashlie had a million questions. Can I have a drink? I'm thirsty. I'm hungry. When is it morning? Can we read more stories? Can we watch Veggie Tales?..... She proceeded to tell me, "I can't sleep....I have too many questions." Haha! She fell asleep around 11pm and I headed off to bed.

I was hoping she'd sleep in until 8 or so, since she's usually the one that sleeps in longer since she takes so long to fall asleep. However, around 6:30 I hear little feet running on my tile. I wake up to Ashlie standing in my doorway staring at me. She climbed in bed with me for a while and we tickled and giggled. During breakfast she told me, "This was a great sleepover!" We watched some more movies, played some games and had a great time.

As I was taking her home this was the conversation we had. "Melanie, I'm sorry I missed your birthday party." "Ashlie, you were there. Remember, it was at Grandma's house?" "Oh yeah. I forgot. I'm going to invite you to my family party AND my friend party. Cuz you're my friend! Only friends and brothers are allowed to come to friend parties." What a cutie she is! And what a fun sleepover/pajama party we had!

New Hobby

My mom and I signed up to take a few golf lessons in June. My mom has taken lessons previously and has her own golf clubs. I've never golfed in my life, unless you count miniature golfing or going to the driving range. I thought it would be a fun new hobby to try out, and we'll see if I like it. I'm kind of excited to try something new. My dad, brother, and mom are all golfers. Wish me luck!

Field Trip

The 3rd grade is going to Mt. Timpanogos Cave next month for our field trip. I have never been to said cave, but have been excited to go! The park service ranger explained that it will take us approx. 1 1/2 hours to walk up to the cave, just under 1 hour in the cave, and 45 minutes to hike down. That's a heck of a lot of hiking! I'm not quite the outdoorsy, hiker type of gal, and I'm getting sort of worried that I'm going to DIE. Hehe. We will need water bottles to carry up the trail, and I heard to bring a jacket for inside the cave, being that it's cold. Has anyone else been to the cave? Any suggestions?

Things that Make Me Smile.....

• New car smell.
• Smell of rain on a spring day. (NOT every day of course!)
  
• Audi TT. Convertible of course.
• Hawaii
• Little toddlers and babies feet. As an adult feet are just disgusting!
• Mountain Dew
• My house when it's newly cleaned and organized.
• Smell of a new book.
• Bubble baths.
• Painted toenails.
• Puppies
  
• Saturdays
• Pink
• Peanut M&Ms
• Getting a phone call from a friend I haven't talked to in a long time.
  
• Kisses and Hugs.
  
• Daisies
• New shoes.
• Baking cookies.
• Cuddling during a movie.
• Getting my hair done at the salon.
• Disneyland
• My students that appreciate all I do for them!
• Adorable parents that are appreciative and come in to volunteer.
• Sleeping in on the weekends.
• Accomplishing everything on my To Do List.
• Finding the perfect gift for someone.
• My nephew and nieces.
• Opening my windows in the spring and summertime.
• The feel of my carpet after it's vacuumed.
• Emails and texts from people I love.

I Hate.....

• Men that are crappy husbands.
• Crappy fathers.
  
• Men that think they're a great father, but really they were only the sperm donor.
• Helicopter moms.
• Kids that do NOT follow directions.
  
• People that are fat and blame it on being pregnant.
  
• When you exchange an item to the store for the exact same item because the first one was defective and they want you to pay more for it because there is no longer a sale.
• Annoying little dogs that yip all the time. (I'm a big dog kinda gal)
• Cats. Not only am I allergic to them, but I find them very annoying and moody!
• Having a zit on my face when it's picture day, or something else equally important.
• Pants that don't fit because they're too short. I'm tall, but seriously, is it that difficult to find long pants that I love?
• When I miss a show and realize my DVR didn't record it.
• Denzel (the previous owner of my telephone number). Dude, you have crappy credit and I'm sick of telling all the creditors that call that this is no longer your number. Oh, and I think it might be important to tell your own mother another way she can contact you if you no longer have this number!
• Solicitors that apparently can't read the "No Soliciting" sign on my door.
• Finding a piece of lint on the floor and thinking it's a spider.
• Hard water.
  
• Going to the grocery store and finding they are out of what you went there for in the first place.
• Finding the perfect shirt and then realizing they're out of your size.
• Veins in chicken.

Flat Irons

I've been researching a ton about flat irons. I used to have the delusion that they were only for really long, curly hair that you wanted to straighten. I have since found out about using them with short and straight hair. I learned how to use them to straighten, bend, curl, flip, etc. So many uses for such a fun hair tool. Look here to see the Chi I like for such a great price. With the new hair style I'm wanting I think it'd be fun and different to try not only using a round brush when I dry it, but also making it smooth with a little bend using a flat iron. I am loving the folica.com website. They have so many products on great sales, with free shipping, free pouches, etc. The reviews by customers can be quite addicting to read and find out more about what people think and the hair tools they love and hate. Thanks to all the great friends that have helped me in sharing what they use, what they love, and how everything works.

Sale! Sale! Sale!

I love Bath and Body Works and I love when they have their fabulous sales. Right now they have a buy 3 get 3 free sale, where you can find some great scents! Some of my current favorites that I had to stock up on were Japanese Cherry Blossom, White Citrus, and the all time classic Warm Vanilla Sugar. Not to forget my all time favorite foot lotion, the Heel of Approval. Once I started using this I've never tried anything else. It keeps my feet super soft during the winter and summer. Love it! If you haven't tried it you better get some. It's 2 for $20 right now. There you have it. My spiel for the day! My mom and I had a great day spending and saving a bundle.

Netflix

Is anyone else a huge fan of Netflix like I am? I've been a member for maybe a year now and I'm completely addicted. I love that I can catch up on my favorite tv shows and try out some new ones as well. I love that I can get new movies and old movies. I love that when I mail it in I get my next one in about 2 days from the day I mail it.

I recently found out that they now have unlimited access through the Wii. Woot! Woot! My dad and brother have the Xbox360 and have been watching movies on it, which I think is great. I heard a while ago that they were going to make that available for the Wii sometime soon, and now it is. I'm anxiously awaiting the free disc arriving today so I can hopefully get it all set up tonight. I'll be a movie watching freak! Hehe :) Anyone want to have a movie night?

A New 'Do?

I'm thinking it's time for a change and I want a new haircut. I love having shorter hair, and I have totally loved my flippy 'do, but I want to try something different. I want something fast and easy to do every morning, definitely low maintenance, and something fun and flirty. I love my golden/blond hair color and will probably keep that about the same, but have been looking at short haircuts. The picture posted here is one that I found recently and I'm thinking I really love it! I don't have my next haircut until the end of May, but who knows, maybe I could try curling it under in the meantime and seeing what happens. :) What do you think? Should I try it?

Fresh and New

Are there any of you that love Stampin' Up as much as I do? Have you heard that they're retiring some of their colors and bringing back some old in-colors and adding brand new ones for permanent colors in their new catalog in July? I'm excited for some of my favorites to be coming back, such as Wild Wasabi, Pink Pirouette, and Riding Hood Red. However, I'm a little sad to see a ton of some great ones leaving.

If you're anything like me, you better stock up on your favorites now, before they're gone for good. :)

Happy Spring!

I have been slacking lately in my posting. Once the entire month of March? Sheesh! I had a fabulous time off track. It sure went by quickly, like it usually does. On the bright side, I don't have to set up my classroom until Wednesday, and then we have Spring Break until the following Tuesday, so I really do have some more time to relax. I spent all of last week in St. George, and didn't want to come back home. I got my tax return (yay!) and after paying off some bills I have to admit I did a little splurging. I got some new Cricut cartridges (on a fabulous sale of course), an Ipod docking station (thanks Greg!), and had a few other shopping excursions with my mom in St. George and Vegas. I have to say I enjoyed myself while I was off.

I also had a few days of subbing, and caught up on my house cleaning and got my doctor's appointments out of the way. I'm think I'm almost ready to head back to school and get back into the routine of things. And last but definitely not least, I'm almost finished with the final Fablehaven and enjoying every minute of it. I want to thank everyone who gave me some book suggestions, I've put a few on my list at the library. :)

Welcome March

I go off track on Friday. Hooray! I'm definitely ready for a vacation. I'm also so ready for spring to come I can hardly stand it. I'm dying to wear my spring clothes, break out my flip flops, and start enjoying the sun. While off track I'm catching up on doctor's appointments (luckily getting those over with my first few days), hopefully going to St. George for a bit, and subbing for some extra money.

Has anyone read the Percy Jackson books? I'm thinking I need to get on it and start reading those. I've heard the movie was great, but want to have read the book before I go see it. Any other suggestions on books that are a must read while I'm off track (besides the new Fablehaven of course)?

Mary Kay Consultant

I am such a HUGE fan of Mary Kay! I have been using most of their products for a few years now. If you saw my makeup collection you would probably laugh....trust me, most people do. I've tried just about everything they have to offer, and I love, love, love it! After talking with some family and friends I decided it would be worth my time and effort to start selling it, considering I use so much.

I'm not going to be the pushy, pressure type of consultant, I hate people like that. I'm probably not going to have parties or do anything of that kind at the time, but if any of my fellow bloggers are interested in getting some products or have questions of any sort I'd be happy to help. So please, contact me if you're ever interested. I would never sell anything that I don't absolutely love myself!

Fablehaven Book 5

I'm SO excited for the final Fablehaven, Keys to the Demon Prison to come out on March 23rd. You can bet I will be pre-ordering this one. I have all of the previous Fablehavens and am in love with them all! I hope the new one doesn't disappoint. I am a little sad the series will be ending, but I guess all good things must come to an end eventually. So if you haven't read them, you better get on that!

I'm Done!

Parent teacher conferences are over. Yay! This week was so crazy! It was definitely nice having Monday off for the holiday, but then it seemed there was so much to do on Tuesday to get ready for conferences. I only had one no show appointment on Wednesday (I sort of expected that one). Thursday was my shorter night, I was out of here by 6:00. That was the best feeling ever! I do still miss when conferences were on Thursday and Friday, which would mean no school the next day. Lucky traditional teachers get the Friday after conferences off....yeah, NOT us! I woke up this morning and somehow dragged myself out of bed. I'm trying my best to stay awake and might be tempted to have a Dr. Pepper with my lunch today. :) Wish me luck.

Todays Musings

Have you ever thought about why it seems some people have the perfect life? I did say, "seems", since who knows what really goes on behind closed doors. Some people were shocked upon hearing of my divorce, some were fantastic and loyal friends sticking by my side through it all. I have truly appreciated all of the love and support I have received before, during, and after my marriage.

To say I got a divorce, or my marriage didn't work out is a huge understatement. I said this before and I'll say it again, I never truly understood divorce until I experienced it first hand. Everyone who has been through a divorce can relate in many ways, yet everyone has their own diverse, and painful experience. I can't believe I have been divorced for a year and half. Sure I have lonely, crappy, pathetic moments where I just want to disappear, but being able to focus on my happiness and my personal worth has been greater than I could ever have imagined.

My life was a living Hell from the week following our marriage throughout the rest of our 3 years together. Every day seemed to be the worst it could possibly be, yet the following day would always top it. Who was this man that I married? Sure, we had our good days....maybe a few times a week to start, which dwindled and became farther apart. I'd never felt so worthless, put down and emotionally abused. Of course I was led to believe something was wrong with me, and everything that happened was always my fault. I admit I was starting to question if something WAS wrong with me.....if you hear something enough times, don't you start to believe it?

I didn't know what was normal or unacceptable behavior anymore.....I felt like I had been flipped upside down so many times I didn't know which way was up. Looking back on things I have such a different perspective on it all, yet when you're living it, it's so hard to see things the way you would as an outsider. I had become so emotionally beaten down and discouraged I was living in survival mode. I wasn't me, I didn't really exist. I went through the motions of life, but I wasn't living. Luckily for me, I had great family and friends that would assure me that I was worth something, and deserved the best in every aspect of my life.

I hate that I don't trust men in general, and I'm sorry for those of you that receive my doubting questions or random rants. I hate that I don't want to get close enough or love someone enough to let them hurt me.....and if you do ever hurt me I will physically beat you! I hate that I feel I have a huge scar on my heart that will never completely heal. I hate that I don't feel normal, but what is normal anyway?

I didn't really know how this post was going to turn out until I started writing it. My blog is sort of like a journal to me (since I'm horrible about writing in one) and it seems you lucky readers get to hear the good, the bad, and the ugly. :)

Free Giveaway!

Free giveaway.....Cutie Pie apron and vinyl lettering "Kiss the Cook" plate. Click here to enter.

Already?

I definitely don't blog as often as I should. But then again, I don't really have that exciting of a life to have enough things to blog about. I can't believe it's already the middle of February. I can't believe tomorrow is our Valentine's party at school. I'm SO thankful for a fabulous room mom, that has planned everything and coordinated all the volunteers so I have nothing to worry about. I haven't had a room mom in years, and have sort of been used to doing everything and anything myself. What a nice change it is to have a few less things to worry about. Sometimes it's the little things that seem to make a huge difference, right?

Have I mentioned that my shower is officially finished (I hope)? As of last week the glass door is now installed, and all of the annoying mistakes have been fixed (I think). Yay! I'm so sick of workmen coming in and out of my house and never feeling settled. It's so great to have a huge shower and enjoy a little relaxation every now and then.

Ouch!

Yesterday after school I got to watch my little nephew, Garrett, for a few hours until his piano lesson at 6:00. He was thrilled to get to come to my house! We had a blast playing Super Mario Bros. on my wii, coloring, playing the board game Sorry, and he even shared his Kit Kat and Froot Loop snacks with me.

As I was cleaning up the game and putting it back on the shelf in the closet with all the other games, I knocked a bunch of the board games over.....including a dominoes set. It's in one of those metal, heavy, boxes and of course was completely full of those porcelain looking dominoes. It smacked me in the face, above my eyebrow and dumped dominoes all over the floor and down the stairs. Can I say pain?! Cute Garrett was very sympathetic and had to feel the large bump on my head and helped me pick up all the dominoes. Needless to say I had a splitting headache the rest of the night! Luckily, today it's not throbbing anymore, though it's definitely tender. It's not as red as it was last night so it's not as obvious to everyone else I hope, and I'm really hoping it doesn't bruise or something stupid like that.

Bearpaw Boots

I've been wanting some boots like these ever since I saw the Uggs version. Knowing that I could never, nor would I want to ever, spend that kind of money. It seems everyone has a pair of some brand or another. I've been searching lately for my very own pair and ran across these babies. I'm a fan of Zappos.com since they have free shipping and free returns. That way if the shoes don't fit, or I don't end up liking them after all, it's easy enough to get a full refund. Yes, I did order up a pair of these today and my rationalization is......I can always return them. So what do you think? Does anyone else have boots like these? And in case you were wondering, yes, I was a good girl this year, and I do deserve a new pair of boots! :)

Pioneer Woman

I've recently ran across this fun blog. I love that the recipes make me want to try them out. I love that she shows pictures with each step so you can actually see what it's going to look like. I love that she adds some fun humor along the way. She also has a cookbook out called The Pioneer Woman Cooks that I'm considering looking into. Has anyone else heard of her? Or her cookbook?

Lost Season 6

I'm a HUGE Lost fan! I bought myself Lost Season 5 after Christmas and have been refreshing my memory since it was last on TV. I've also got my parents hooked on it. :) For those of you that don't know yet, the new, and final season starts February 2nd. Hooray! I'm mighty curious how they're going to wrap all the loose ends up. I'll be so sad when it's all over, what will I be addicted to then?

Christmas Recap

I never did blog about my Christmas, so here goes. Christmas Eve I spent at my parents house, sleeping over through Christmas. We watched some of my favorite fabulous Christmas movies such as Christmas Vacation and Christmas Story. I was spoiled this year and received lots of great gifts from my family. I got a bunch of shirts, a gift card to Game Stop (to some day buy the New Super Mario Bros. whenever it comes back in stock), a necklace, dvds, and a Cocoa-Latte hot chocolate maker (YUM).

Christmas day was spent relaxing, visiting my sister and her family and having our traditional family Christmas dinner. Mike and Natalee and baby Lexi surprised us with a visit Christmas night. We had previously thought they were not coming for Christmas, but they decided Christmas Eve to come after all. They left Idaho Christmas morning and spent some time with Natalee's family and then our family later that day. It was so great to finally see my adorable new niece! They were able to stay until Sunday morning.

Sunday afternoon I left with my parents for a trip to St George. We stayed until New Years Eve and enjoyed a lot of shopping, relaxing, eating out and movie watching (New Moon, and Blind Side). It wasn't too warm being only in the 30's, but it was at least a bit warmer than Salt Lake. It's fun to just get away. :) I had a great off track and Christmas vacation, even though it does seem to go by way too fast!

New Year, New Start

I haven't really fallen off the face of the earth....well, maybe just a few times. I kept thinking about blogging while I was off track, but couldn't seem to start. I've had many things to blog about, good and bad, but never took the time to do it. So, here I am, it's a new year, and I figured I'd start it out with a new post.

I found a great quote in a book I've been reading, The Sunflower by Richard Paul Evans. "There are times, it seems, that God throws a cosmic switch that moves the track beneath us, hurling our lives headlong in a new and uncertain direction. Of these times just two things are certain: It's best we don't know what's ahead. We can never go back." How true that is!

Some days as I look in the mirror I wonder who that person is staring back at me. I've seen it through the good and bad times. I seem to fight the emotion I see on that face, as tears fall uncontrollably. I've been through self destruction, thinking "screw the world", not seeming to care much about anything. Been in denial, not wanting to deal with what I've been dealt. It's so much easier to lessen the pain, if only temporarily. Life is still moving, whether I want it to or not, I can't move it back, no matter how hard I try. I don't feel like the same person I was 5 years ago......so much has happened since then. I've had my share of trials and tribulations, not always enjoying the scenery along the way. I fight change, and sometimes want to crawl into a little hole and wait it out. How much easier it would be....

It'd be such a great world if things would just go my way. If I could be who I wanted to be. If I could do the things I wanted to do. If I could have the things that I most desired. But then, life wouldn't be life, would it? I wouldn't grow as much as I do every day. I wouldn't be the person that I am today if I hadn't fought my way to be where I am. It might be a long and tiresome journey, but I'm amazed at what I can do and who I can become. Who knows what this year has in store for me. Dare I say....Bring it on!