It's been a few month since I last blogged. I've been wanting to blog about a few things, but haven't been able to bring myself to do it until now. I recently was in a relationship which ended quite suddenly and without much explanation. I realize that things happen for a reason whether you want them to or not. I've been on dates since my divorce, but I've always compared everything to my ex and seemed to be shutting myself off from everyone. I thought it was a lot easier to sabotage any relationship from the beginning rather than waiting for someone else to hurt me. Screwed up, right? This time I was finally letting myself be happy.
I was always so afraid that I would never be able to love someone again, that I would forever be a hot mess. It was such a relief being able to know that there are people out there like me. That I'm not alone in what I'm feeling or what I'm going through. That I was able to have a great time with someone who wasn't my ex. That someone thought I was amazing, and treated me the way I have always deserved to be treated. It was so nice to see a glimpse of what could be. It was another constant reminder that my life is going in the right direction. I've left behind things I no longer want to be a part of my life. Even though I still make a ton of mistakes I know what I want and don't want. I'm such a better and stronger person for my trials and though I don't ever want to go through them again, I am happy with the person I am today.
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2 comments:
I love your attitude. I'm not sure why these things happen & we may not find out just yet. However, I am so glad that you have realized there are good men out there & that you deserve to be happy!
You definitely deserve to be happy. It will come. I'm glad you've been able to let yourself get close to someone--even if he wasn't THE one. You'll find him. And it's most important to love who you are.
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