Off Track

This is my last week on track. Hooray for off track times during the year! Have I mentioned that I love year round? I love having my breaks spread out through the year. I love having almost all of December off. I love that I get 3-4 weeks off every time I go off track. I love that being off track gives me a much needed rest and I come back to school ready to teach again, rather than feeling burned out.

After school on Friday I leave for 10 fun filled days at Disneyland. I love Disneyland and haven't been in quite some time, so I am excited, not to mention spending time with my cute niece and nephew. I love them to pieces!! Sadly, my credit card balance isn't quite down as much as I would've liked. I know I'll be charging a bit more while there, and will have to work at paying it off in the next few months before Christmas...eek! Can you believe Christmas is in like 4 months? Seriously, didn't we just celebrate that?! I used to love, love, love Christmas and all of the holiday cheer and crap, but not so much anymore. Needless to say, I'm not exactly looking forward to that time of year, but that's for another time and another angry post. :) In the meantime, HOORAY for going off track!

What a Pain

Last year I got a back spasm, or whatever the heck it was. I was in constant pain and could not do anything normal. The worst was getting out of bed in the morning, where I didn't sleep the night before since every time I moved I woke up in horrible pain. When my alarm would go off to get me up for work I couldn't get out of bed without crying and wishing I didn't have to move ever again. Definitely not fun times! Yesterday at work I again hurt my back. The annoying part is I really don't know what I did to it. It doesn't seem as bad as it was last time, and I'm hoping it doesn't continue to get worse. :( I can function a little better, in that I hurt but am still able to sort of do things for myself. I didn't sleep much last night and am not thrilled to be at work today since it hurts to sit and to stand. I can't decide which gives me more relief. Blasted thing!

Bitterness

Warning: this post will be pathetic and negative. Feel free to skip this one. Have I mentioned that I have a bad attitude and I pretty much just don't care? I have no desire to date or do much of anything lately. I know that I'm bitter and it's my own fault. I seem to pull away from most everyone, causing more loneliness for myself. I don't want to go out with friends most days, I don't want to meet new people, I don't want to start over with the whole dating crapola. I feel like I've given up in many respects (like I said, I KNOW I have a bad attitude) and I'm not trying at all. The couple dates I have gone on were alright, but I wasn't putting forth much of an effort, and I didn't care to try. The guys figured out I wasn't interested and once again I didn't seem to care. Seriously, what is wrong with me?

Before I go on, I want to recognize my fabulous friends (you know who you are) that have been with me through every step of the way. They have been there through my good times and bad. Thanks for being my shoulder to cry on, and my rock when I need that extra strength. Thanks for cheering me up and laughing with me during happier times, and being understanding and supportive during the tougher ones.

While I'm on my soap box, can I talk about people getting special treatment?Why is it that other people with "issues" get treated special and we all have to be extra nice, or extra understanding, yet my "issues" don't seem to matter? Everyone has their own issues or problems, but mine are non existent I guess. I'm not expecting everyone to treat me "special", but be a little understanding, please. I do have feelings, and I do still hurt most of the time. My life isn't all sunny just because my divorce is over. I still have a lot of pain and a lot of damage I'm dealing with everyday. Some days it's a lot harder to pretend than it is other days. So please, give me some slack and don't expect me to be happy all the time.

I Need it! I Want it?

I've been wanting this CD since I've been hearing all their great songs on the radio. Green Day has forever been one of my favorites! I went to their concert a couple years ago, and wish I could go to more. I've been telling everyone I want it for my birthday. Now I'm starting to think I might need it before our Disneyland trip (post below)? It would be great to have it on my ipod on that long drive to enjoy, right? Hmm....now the question is, do I need it now? Or can I be patient and wait for my birthday? Decisions, decisions, I've never been very good at those.

Mickey Mouse Here We Come

In 3 weeks my entire family is going to Disneyland. Hooray! I haven't been to Disneyland since I went with a friend of mine in college ("I'm not falling for that one. I'm not getting on the freeway. Hey! We're on the freeway." That was for you Kim.). I love Disneyland and am looking forward to going. We'll be gone Sept. 4 (leaving as soon as I get out of school. I'll be off track!) until Sept. 12. I'm looking forward to experiencing some Disney again, it's been way too long!

We'll be staying in a Marriott condo about 30 minutes away from the park. I'm thinking about 3 to 4 days at Disneyland, maybe some at the beach, and some for relaxation of course. Since it's been about 10 or more years since I've been, is there anything I NEED to do or see while I'm there? Any fabulous eating places? Great shopping spots I can't miss? Help me out and let me know the things you love doing.

P.S. Did I mention I'm not the happiest road tripper? I'm planning on bringing plenty of snacks, books, and of course my new ipod, but all of you be forewarned I'm not always the greatest when it comes to LONG car rides. I want to get there and be done! It's Disneyland (I am a kid afterall) and I want the fun to begin, not the long, endless hours of boredom in getting there. On a better note, I did make it all the way to Mt. Rushmore in South Dakota and I survived (with no impatience I might add). I actually didn't mind the driving too much, except for the dead scenery I enjoyed it. There is hope. Some day when I'm rich and famous, I'll own my own plane and be able to travel wherever and whenever I want. :)

Happy Birthday Garrett

This past Saturday was my darling nephew, Garrett's birthday. He turned 7 years old. I can't believe he's already in 2nd grade this year. How fast they grow up! My sister had a little family party on Sunday and his friend party was on Saturday. Happy Birthday Garrett! I love this picture of Garrett and Ashlie, not exactly sure when it was taken though.

Selfish People Suck

The world does not revolve around you. Enough said......

All by Myself

My parents have officially moved out into their new home. They are 10-15 minutes away from my house, and even closer to my sister, in South Jordan. I love their new home, and think it's got many of the things they were looking forward (minus the formal dining room). I like that they're much closer and I won't have to be taking the freeway during awful winter weather.
It's nice to have my craft room put back together again, and begin to work on my cards for next week's card club. I like having my space back and getting back into the routine of things. I'll have to post some pictures later of my parents living quarters while at my house. Haha!
It's been kind of quiet and lonely since they're gone. No one to eat meals with, no one to watch tv or movies with. I think I started getting used to the company. Good thing I can visit them whenever I want since they're so close now.

Why?

Why is it that Sunday night I don't sleep well? Why can't it be Friday or Saturday night where I have the option of sleeping in the next morning? Why is it that my mind picks Sunday night to run wild and think of everything possible? Why does it have to be Monday today? Why do I have to be SO tired today? Why did I only get about 4 hours of sleep last night?

I'm exhausted today and struggling to be here. I couldn't fall asleep forever last night. Then when I did, I kept waking up every hour or more. I had the most bizarre dreams....scary in fact. My mind kept going and going, not letting me get any rest. Ugh! I hate that I pick Sunday night to have a terrible night sleep, when the rest of the weekend was fabulous and I slept great. Seriously, why is it the night you need sleep to function the next day you can't seem to get enough?

Blood....ick!

For the past however many months I've been getting excruciatingly painful charlie horses in my calves and toes many times each month. Sometimes it will wake me up from a deep sleep (oh so much fun!) and other times I'll be walking and end up clutching my foot in pain. The more I started thinking about it I realized that the stomach medicine I take for my acid reflux can cause calcium deficiency (my doctor had previously told me this). I called the doctor's office and told them about my frequent charlie horses. They wanted me to come in to get some blood work done to find out if it's calcium or potassium deficiency. Each day during the week the blood work people go home at about 4:00....which makes it pretty impossible to get there anytime but Friday.

After school on Friday I left a little early, and made me way across town to the doctor's office. I arrived there shortly after 3:00, making sure I had plenty of time. The receptionist ladies proceeded to tell me that the lady that does blood leaves at 3:00 on Friday. Now why in $#&! would the stupid nurse lady tell me there'd be there later if they weren't going to be!! I was frustrated to say the least. I wasn't thrilled to have my blood taken, but wanted to get the blasted thing over with. What a waste of a trip.