Weekend?

This weekend was great, in that I had conference to watch. I really enjoyed it I must say! It's fabulous when I'm watching it because I want to, not because I have to, ya know. Great times. On the other hand, my weekend wasn't quite so fabulous. For the past 2 weekends, my parents have been in St. George setting up their new summer home. Last weekend my sister and her family went, this past weekend my brother and his wife went. Now, to give my family credit, they did invite me both times, I just wasn't in the mood to go. I love my sister and brother, and enjoy being around them, yet lately it seems it's harder for me to be around some people than it is to just be lonely by myself.

I was lonely this weekend and last weekend without my parents, they've been fantastic, coming over to visit anytime I need them. I seem to handle things pretty well during the day, errands to run, things to clean, places to be, but after dinner things start to fall apart. Most nights I'm just darn lonely and pathetic. I don't feel like going out, yet I hate staying in by myself. Everything I do reminds me of Matt and I hate it. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it.